我的沙盒和TO-DV沙盒都不能用，只能先放到这儿了因为某些问题，现在改为今天之前翻译完毕
第一部分：自我
M.E.G. 访谈记录摘录， Entity 440
历史学家
Entity 440，也被称为"历史学家"，是一个居住在 Level 718 的神秘实体，它似乎拥有关于我们宇宙的所有知识。不幸的是，对于那些我们可能渴望解答的重大问题，只有在同意永远留在该层作为沉默僧侣的成员时，才能得到答案。
采访者: 尼克·凯沃尔基安
- 被采访者:历史学家
- 前言: 尼克·凯沃尔基安请求采访历史学家，作为他关于杏仁水的持续研究的一部分。
由于无法在Level 718拍摄照片，Gabby Bavitz制作了采访草图。
<摘录开始>
尼克·凯沃尔基安：杏仁水是什么？
历史学家：你们所说的“杏仁水”是在整个后室中常见的液体。化学上，它是一种溶液，主要由水组成，水分子H₂O占溶液体积的94.3%。另外5.4%含有葡萄糖、二氧化碳、氧气以及各种离子电解质，特别是氯和氰化物。最后，大约0.3%的溶液由血清白蛋白、球蛋白和纤维蛋白组成，这些蛋白质通常在脊椎动物的血液中找到。然而，你已经知道这些了。你在显微镜下研究过杏仁水，对其成分了如指掌——这并不是你真正想问的。你想知道为什么杏仁水在后室如此普遍。你想知道为什么杏仁水尽管化学成分平凡却有它的效果。我知道你对知识的渴望，你的痴迷，但只有你同意永远不离开这个层级，你才能得到这些问题的答案。
尼克·凯沃尔基安：是这样吗？到底是什么让这些问题如此重要，以至于你不能在我没有加入你们的沉默僧侣之前告诉我答案？
历史学家：我们也不能告诉你答案，除非你同意永远不离开这个层级。
尼克·凯沃尔基安：嗯……真遗憾。谢谢你的时间。
< 摘录结束>
十一只鹰
亲爱的宠物黑猩猩莫，在阿尔法基地突然去世。
安息吧
我们带着沉重的心情宣布，阿尔法基地的吉祥物莫已经去世。莫最初是由M.E.G.探索队爱丽丝在Level 18发现的。不是每天都能遇到一个永远浸泡在机油中的小黑猩猩，也绝不是每天都能遇到一个足够友好，愿意跟随M.E.G.成员回到阿尔法基地的黑猩猩。莫真的是独一无二的。尽管没有人能够真正理解他那湿漉漉、毛茸茸的脑袋里在想什么，但许多阿尔法基地的成员都与莫有着真正的联系；它真的是我们中的一员。
一位M.E.G.成员，詹姆斯·卡维思，深情地回忆起莫。“我记得第一次见到莫的时候。他走到我面前，给了我一个大大的拥抱，把我的衣服都弄上了油。他弄坏了我最喜欢的一条裤子。我试着把那条牛仔裤放进洗衣机洗了大约一打次，直到我不得不放弃那些牛仔裤，接受那个油渍永远洗不掉的事实。莫确实是个有趣的猩猩。”
阿尔法基地的另一位成员加比·巴维茨说："像每个人一样，莫也有他的高潮和低谷，不过我愿意认为主要是高潮。我有时会想，作为一个被困在混凝土走廊世界中的猩猩，而不是在野外，会是什么感觉，但我有一种感觉，莫从不介意。我们所有人都需要一些时间来从他的去世中恢复过来。"
上周二，莫的尸体在阿尔法基地它最喜欢的房间里被发现，全身血液被抽干，头部和胸部的大部分地区完全不见了。死因被判定为自然死亡，莫被埋葬在Level 18，靠近他最初被发现的地方。数十名M.E.G.成员参加了他的葬礼。莫将真正被怀念。
历史记录中关于杏仁水的不一致之处
作者：尼克·凯沃尔基安
我已经仔细研究了杏仁水一段时间。不幸的是，关于它我想了解的许多事情都让我陷入了死胡同。我不知道为什么它如此一贯地普遍存在，也不知道为什么它有它的效果——我知道它是由什么组成的，但这只带来了比答案更多的问题。在寻找信息的过程中，我发现了一些关于杏仁水在历史记录中表现的有趣事物。
以下是我所能找到的关于杏仁水的最早记录。它是Level 4办公室终端中的一份聊天记录。
JackalOfSpades: 讽刺的是，饮水机里的水真的很温。不过据我观察，它是安全的，但如果闻到杏仁味，就别喝了。
Bart0nius: 糟糕。
ClassicHopper: Bart0nius？你还好吗？
Bart0nius: 我现在没事了，我刚才晕倒了一会儿。所以，不会再冒险喝那水了。
ClassicHopper: 听起来是个明智的决定。
ClassicHopper: 祝你好运。
有趣的是，这句话暗示了喝杏仁水在某种情况下是有害的。根据我所能查到的资料,，杏仁水在很长一段时间里被认为是有害的，只有当它被倒在伤口上时，它的治疗特性才会发挥作用。然而，在某个时刻，这种情况发生了变化：所有当前的文件都列出 杏仁水 是安全的，可以饮用。
我的当前假设如下：我认为杏仁水的化学成分发生了变化。据我收集到的信息，这种效果随时间的转变与描述中的味道从“苦杏仁”变为“香草”相对应。我相信，液体之所以得名“杏仁水”的原始杏仁味来自于其中大量的氰化物；这可以解释饮用时的效果。然而，随着时间的推移，这种化学成分可能已经转变为我们今天在杏仁水中看到的相对较低的氰化物含量，完全消除了那种原始效果。当然，目前还没有已知的科学过程会导致来自后室各地样本中的氰化物含量都统一降低。
我想，这又是一个关于杏仁水的谜团问题。
M.E.G. 内部报告: 新 域层级 探险
域层级
域层级是一个鲜为人知的领域，它包含了每一个理论上存在于任何宇宙中的概念的代表。这些概念以小球体的形式出现，被称为“复杂概念交汇点”，当触摸到它们时，会将概念投射到漫游者的脑海中。这些复杂概念交汇点被组织成对应于一个更广泛的概念的簇，称为“确切概念区域”。进入Level 域最简便的方法是使用域层级密钥。然而，使用这些密钥偶尔会导致密钥的一部分消失。
这张照片是由尼克·凯沃尔基安在意外进入域层级后拍摄的。
最近，在M.E.G.成员尼克·凯沃尔基安意外触发了一个当时未知的域层级密钥后，在域层级中发现了一个全新的确切概念区域。这个密钥呈现为一只浸泡在机油中的黑猩猩，位于阿尔法基地。据信，凯沃尔基安在无意中使用域层级密钥时所想象的确切概念是“信息”，导致他进入了一个完全未被发现的确切概念区域。在该层级上度过了几个小时后，凯沃尔基安在“信息”的确切概念区域中睡着了，将他传送到了Level 906。不幸的是，在这个过程中，密钥的一部分被摧毁了，并且凯沃尔基安已请求不要将黑猩猩死亡的方式公之于众，因为担心来自阿尔法基地工作人员的评判。
在凯沃尔基安前往域层级的勘探之前，这个层级被认为科学兴趣不大。它通常不值得冒其不可预测且理解不深的特性所带来的危险，因此基本上没有被研究过。尽管约翰·卡西迪在该域层级的实验证明了层级内的概念实际上可以在现实中显现，但这个域层级的特性极其不可靠且危险，并且与层级中的复杂概念交汇点互动产生的投射似乎并非物质的，只允许观察。然而，信息可以在没有物质的情况下转移，因此M.E.G.决定发起另一次对域层级的勘探，以确定更多信息。这次勘探旨在作为一个概念验证，自愿领导这次勘探的尼克·凯沃尔基安将被指示进入域层级并收集所需的信息，然后迅速撤退出来，以避免不可预见的复杂情况。
勘探计划如下:
- 由于域层级钥匙每次只能传送一个人，并且我们目前手中只有一块钥匙碎片（部分被毁的黑猩猩尸体），尼克·凯沃尔基安将是这次勘探中唯一的M.E.G.成员。
- 凯沃尔基安将携带一套标准的M.E.G.生存包和一包安眠药进入Beta基地。
- 凯沃尔基安将触摸钥匙碎片并专注于"信息"这一确切概念，进入域层级。
- 凯沃尔基安将使用穿越方程前往一个包含在纸张上写下的多个控制问题答案的复杂概念交汇点。凯沃尔基安被指示在这个过程中即兴发挥，以确定从该层级获取信息的最佳方式。
- 在测试了控制问题之后，凯沃尔基安将尝试获取问题“什么是后室？”的答案。
- 一旦这个目标达成，凯沃尔基安将服用一颗安眠药并躺下在确切概念区域中睡觉，预计他会退出到Level 906，在那儿他将请求布兰奇女士将他传送回Beta基地。
这次探险成功完成后，我们可以在未来考虑将域层级作为信息来源。
M.E.G.采访日志摘录，监督者Kat
监督者Kat
迄今为止，M.E.G.三位创始人中最神秘的一位，Kat居住在Level 135的幽闭森林中。监督者Kat与M.E.G.事务的互动非常少，以至于她的"监督者"头衔受到一些人的质疑。但是，由于她拥有深厚的知识和丰富的经验，其他两位监督者在重要事务上经常向她寻求建议。Kat的背景一直笼罩在神秘之中，但有传言说她是失落一族的成员之一，已经在后室中生活了数千年。
采访者：尼克·凯沃尔基安
被采访者：监督者 Kat
前言：尼克·凯沃尔基安请求采访监督者Kat，以获取她在杏仁水研究方面的历史视角，作为他正在进行的研究的一部分。监督者Kat通常不接受访客，但凯沃尔基安已从监督者Andrew那里获得特别许可。
监督者Kat
<开始日志>
Kat: 我听说你想要我告诉你水的历史？
尼克·凯沃尔基安: 杏仁水，但对，那会很棒。
Kat: 将我所见过的无数记忆编织成一幅完整的挂毯并不容易，但我会尝试。
尼克·凯沃尔基安: 继续。
[Kat指向她左边的一棵大桦树。]
Kat: 你看到这棵树了吗？
[尼克·凯沃尔基安点头。]
Kat: 它看起来很静止。你可以每天去看望那棵树多年，它看起来总是一样的。但我在这个地方生活了足够长的时间，我记得它第一次发芽的那一天；我记得它曾经小得多以及它如何变化。所以，即使现在它看起来静止，我知道它在移动；我知道一个世纪后我回来时，它将是一个完全不同的生物，但仍然看起来像以前一样静止。我们的世界就像那棵树：它变化得如此缓慢，以至于我们肉眼看不见，但它确实在变化。
Kat: 当我出生的时候，没有混凝土和钢筋的迷宫，没有无尽的黄色壁纸走廊。我们的世界看起来更像这片森林。这是因为在地表上，事情大不相同。随着地表的变化，我们所居住的镜子也随之变化。
Kat: 但镜子反射的不仅仅是它吸收的光。它看到的比我们的眼睛能理解的要多得多，它的镜头扭曲了我们看不见的东西，直到这些扭曲成为新的反射，就像任何之前的东西一样具体。并且仍在移动，独立于它所反射的世界。
一个不完美的反射
Nick Kevorkian: 这到底是什么意思？
Kat: 抱歉。当我回想起这么多事情时，我的思绪往往会飘远。我的意思是，水并不总是今天这个样子。在我的一生中，它已经经历了许多形态。我见过它作为从地球深处冒泡的炽热岩浆，作为呼吸的苔藓，流过岩石和木材，最近则变成了我们饮用的水。
[Kat停顿，倾听风声]
Kat: 有东西在听我们说话，它不属于这里。
[她拿出一把华丽的刀子，向她左边的桦树扔去]
[刀子翻转着，嵌入树干，刺穿了一直伪装在树皮上的一个小人形生物的脖子]
[当生物死去时，皮肤变成了煤烟黑色，绿色的血液滴在了树叶上]
Nick Kevorkian: 那是什么鬼东西？！
Kat: 不要在意。看来 旧时的幽灵又回来了，但它与我们现在的故事无关。不过，这意味着我们需要稍微缩短我们的谈话，所以让我给你留下最后一句话。
[Kat从树皮中拔出刀子，生物落到地上]
桦树上的切口
Kat: 下次我来看这棵树时，它已经长得更多了，但我仍然能看到我刚才给它的伤口。树皮上的切口从根本上改变了它生长的轨迹，但树仍然或多或少地继续沿着当前的轨迹生长。但如果我把整棵树砍倒了呢？那肯定会以不可预测的方式改变事物。树的根缠绕在许多我们永远无法知晓的地方，我们不会为这样的行动可能带来的后果做好准备。
Nick Kevorkian: 这到底是什么意思？
[Kat将刀子插回腰带]
Kat: 这意味着，尽管你有改变自然的力量，但不要惊讶如果自然反过来做出反应。相信我，如果我在我的漫长生命中学到过任何教训，那就是这个。
<结束日志>
第二部分：超越自我
层级域探索结果
| 概念 | 结果 |
|---|---|
| 天空的颜色，写在一张纸上。 | 一张包含“蓝色”一词的纸。 |
| 天空的颜色，用英语写在一张纸上。 | 一张纸，上面写着“没有固有的颜色。感知的颜色通常从浅蓝色到深灰色不等，但根据光线如何折射而变化很大。” |
| 玛莎·华盛顿的姓氏，用英语写在一张纸上。 | 一张纸，上面写着“她死了，吉姆。你给她取什么名字有什么关系？哦，好吧。华盛顿；娘家姓丹德里奇，之前是卡斯蒂斯，在她第一次婚姻之后。 |
| “1 + 2”的答案用英语写在一张纸上。 | 一张包含“三3三三三33333333333三”的纸 |
| 对后室的描述，用英语写在一张纸上。 | 一张纸，上面写着：“一个只有腐臭的潮湿地毯，令人发狂的单调黄色，荧光灯全力运作发出的永无止境的嗡鸣，还有令人深陷其中的大约六亿平方英里随机分割的空荡房间。” |
| 从包含居民不知道的信息的角度对后室的详细描述，用英语写在一张纸上。 | 见所附文件。 |
Daedos，一些早期科学文献中称之为"后室"，这个名字是由居住在其地壳中的几个半智能寄生文化所赋予的，是已知高维宇宙中最大的单一生命体，尽管它在体积上被几个已死亡的生物所超越，例如大环、反虚空、P和上帝。通过模因标记确定，这种生物是一个巨大的超克隆群体，占据了无数无限的三维空间和大约123024azulaks的五维空间，可能进一步扩展到不可感知的更高维度。它的持续扩张归功于它的自我复制过程，在这个过程中，它吸收了被带入其中的模因信息，并将这些模因信息整合到它的模因组的复制中，允许它通过创建包含无限物理表现形式的吸收概念的结来生长。
The 3rd-dimensional Crust that makes up Daedos's outer shell is located entirely within a spatial-well known as The Stack. The Stack's spatially anomalous nature has allowed spatially infinite knots that contain repetitions of similar structures to coexist within the same dimensional area without being separated by 4th-dimensional space. Additionally, in between these knots are a series of voids that allow the knots to expand in 3rd-dimensional space without entering the spatial area of another knot, with few exceptions. This abnormal spatial arrangement is believed to be what has allowed Daedos to attain the unusually long survival it has attained for an organism of its size.
构成达多斯外壳的三维地壳完全位于一个被称为"堆栈"的空间井内。堆栈的空间异常特性使得包含相似结构重复的无限空间结能够在相同的维度区域内共存，而无需通过四维空间分隔。此外，在这些结之间是一系列空隙，允许结在三维空间中扩展而不进入另一个结的空间区域，只有少数例外。这种异常的空间布局被认为是达多斯能够以其大小的生物而言，获得异常长寿的原因。
Extending out of The Stack and into 4th- and 5th-dimensional space is the poorly understood main section of Daedos, known as The Goop. The Goop is a 103024 azulak large 5th-dimensional structure composed almost entirely of abstract memetic material with scattered vacuoles of concrete space, the most massive of which being the central Core. Due to its extension into the 4th and 5th dimensions, The Goop and The Core are incredibly poorly understood but are believed to play an integral role in the structural and metastructural integrity of the organism as a whole and the self-replicating nature of the organism's crust.
For most of Daedos' known history, it took the form of a primarily undefined mass containing snippets of incompatible and contradictory concepts that were believed to have been absorbed from nearby universes, as well as from virtual meme-antimeme pairs created in conceptual fluctuations. This changed, however when The Stack collided mildly with the universe U-749690, and exchange of matter and concepts began occurring between Daedos and U-749690, as well as U-749690's surrounding quantum alternates. This caused Daedos' Crust to take on the conceptual ideas found within the minds of U-749690's semi-sapient life forms, as well as the proliferation of those lifeforms within Daedos' Crust that we see today.
Within the Crust of Daedos are a number of microbiomes containing many different types of specialized cells and micro-organisms that act symbiotically to maintain complex and poorly understood systems of homeostasis within the organism. In addition to these symbiotic micro-organisms, the crust is home to an invasive species of semi-sapient parasitic organism from U-749690, called Etinil, which are particularly of note due to the lasting ecological impact they have caused to Daedos. It is unknown for certain what the existence of the Etinil means for the continued survival of Daedos, but some scientists have theorized that they will inevitably bring the death of Deados due to the damage they have accrued to its homeostatic systems. It is believed that at the current time, Daedos has been rendered incapable of developing new knots in its crust at the rate that they die, and further diversions from the state of homeostasis will lead to unpredictable effects to the organism as a whole.
M.E.G. Interview Log, Entity 440
Interviewer: Nick Kevorkian
Interviewed: The Historian
<Begin Log>
Nick Kevorkian: I'll keep it short because I don't want to waste any of my time ration. Will my plan work?
The Historian: It will work, but it will have consequences beyond what you are prepared for.
Nick Kevorkian: Oh, and what consequences are those?
The Historian: We cannot tell you the answer to that either without you agreeing to never leave the level.
Nick Kevorkian: Why?
The Historian: As harmful as the lies you plan on spreading will be, it will be much less damaging for you to feel the consequences of your actions than for you to learn to rely on us to tell you when it is safe to warp reality with your lies.
Nick Kevorkian: Why do you hate lying so much?
The Historian: We do not hate. We simply know that some things will not be constructive to humanity as a whole, and lying is one of them. Lies are alive, in a way. Not literally by scientific definitions, but they operate on a level similar to that of a virus, invading your brain and controlling you into spreading it to others to increase its rate of infection in much the same way that a simple virus hijacks a cell to produce more copies of itself. You may think you are accomplishing something great, but the infection will spread beyond your control.
Nick Kevorkian: You know everything, so you know I'm doing this for the greater good.
The Historian: There are no good intentions. There are simply good results. Like all humans, your goals are fundamentally selfish. You desire what you see as best for humanity, but only because your brain has been programmed to give you positive emotions when you help others. You do not desire the greater good. You desire the emotions you will feel if you're the one who creates that greater good, and while those emotions may produce a positive outcome in many situations, it's currently making you short-sighted. You refuse to let go of an opportunity to be humanity's savior, and it will be your downfall.
<End Log>
The ENTITY Manifesto
ENTITY
ENTITY is a decentralized group of radical political activists and artists across various levels of the Backrooms that advocate for the rights and equality of entities. The movement spread by word of mouth after the anonymous publishing of a short document known as "The ENTITY Manifesto". Because of the lack of any official leadership structure, the specific actions of the group vary from person to person, ranging from producing political art pieces that bring attention to their beliefs to the infiltration and violent takeover of groups deemed to be harmful to entities.
en·ti·ty
/ˈen(t)ədē/
We are ENTITY.
noun
1. That which has a distinct existence as an individual unit. Often used for organizations which have no physical form.
The human-centric worldview has infected our society and destroyed the lives and minds of not just non-human beings but all of us. We exist with a single purpose: to dissolve the perceived boundaries between "human" and "entity" and improve conditions for all living beings. If you agree with this purpose, then you are ENTITY.
2. The existence of something considered apart from its properties.
Our methods are apart from who we are. Individuals who exist within ENTITY are encouraged to achieve our goal with whichever methods they personally find to be appropriate. It is results that matter, and no matter how large or small your contributions to the movement are, you are ENTITY.
3. Anything about which information or data can be stored in a database; in particular, an organized array or set of individual elements or parts.
We know what you've done to those you call "entities". If that sentence does not strike fear into your heart, then you are one of us, but if it does, then you will see your world crumble around you at the righteous hand of those who value lives beyond their own existence.
4. The state or quality of being or existence.
We do not succumb to the mind sickness of increasingly specific labels. Some divide those who they label as "entities" into boxes, such as "hostile" and "peaceful", and reduce them simply to a collection of numbers and letters that define their existence. There is no "good" or "evil". There is simply complex and nuanced beings who deserve a chance at respect.
5. A spirit, ghost, or the like.
There are those who oppose the work of ENTITY, and while our allies are plentiful, we must be careful who we trust. We will strike loudly with exploding fires of change, but then we must retreat back into hiding. We will elude capture for our own survival and multiply through underground channels until it is safe for us to emerge.
6. An alien lifeform that has no corporeal body.
We have no leaders. We have no central organization. We have no gatekeepers. We simply exist as a fluid movement, tides flowing over the sick shore with no conductor needed to guide our triumphs.
We are ENTITY.
All of us are ENTITY.
Audio recorded from the office of Ace Troth, head of M.E.G. Base Beta
<Begin Log>
Ace Troth: So, what exactly am I looking at?
Nick Kevorkian: My new theory about Almond Water and the backrooms as a whole.
Ace Troth: Explain.
Nick Kevorkian: Well, from what I've gathered, the Backrooms changes over time, and those changes are reflections of people's thoughts. Which means that, in theory, if we can convince enough people to believe something is true, we should be able to manifest it.
Ace Troth: And how do you know that, exactly?
Nick Kevorkian: Well, I don't for sure, but I plan on testing it, and by the nature of it, any test needs to be on a pretty big scale. So, my plan is that since we have concrete evidence of Almond Water changing over time, we convince as many people as possible that Almond Water has morphed into something more powerful, let's call it "Super Almond Water", and see if the properties of Almond Water change to match.
Ace Troth: Kind of a stupid name.
Nick Kevorkian: We'll workshop it later. The point is that this is kind of risky, but if it works, it'll be huge for us.
Ace Troth: Do you know how hard it'll be to get the Overseers to let us spread misinformation? That's against everything the M.E.G. stands for.
Nick Kevorkian: The M.E.G. stands for more than just the truth, and if they can't see that, then don't bother to get their permission. This has the potential to change everything.
Ace Troth: Hm. I'll see what I can do.
<End Scene>
The white lily stares carefully at the closing door, catching one last glimpse of the man exiting before the curtain drops.
The man attached to the flower looks down, reviewing his lines and mumbling to himself. "Ace Troth. Not my favorite part, but it's a living. The dialogue's a little shaky, but the story's alright. Actors trying to be directors… An interesting concept, but it's been done before. ┐(￣ヘ￣)┌"
Audio Recording of Object 77 Appearance
Quinoa
Quinoa is the host of an often-nonsensical radio show, which broadcasts exclusively on Object 77, a radio that appears on and disappears from locations seemingly at random. Quinoa appears to have a uniquely scattered worldview. His knowledge of any given topic is limited and often incorrect. Episodes of "Talking With Quinoa" are usually nonsensical and disjointed, with very few reoccurring topics between broadcasts. Past talking points have included a ranking of rock-based materials based on how "crunchy" they are, dating advice, seances, and a discussion of the merits of cannibalism.
Quinoa: Hello and welcome to Episode 100 of "Talking With Quinoa." Do you think God or Darwin or whatever's out there in this cold universe of ours will ever forgive you for your sins? I don't!
Quinoa: I actually got a phone call from YHWH the other day. He told me he was going to beat me to death for eating more bowls of soup than is normally considered reasonable. But… bowls of soup taste so good! I love the way the soup juice dribbles down my face whenever I take a bite out of the shell. Yum!
Newkirk: Ahem.
Quinoa: Right! Today is a very special episode. We're here in the studio interviewing world-renowned chef Peter Newkirk.
Newkirk: Author, actually, but thank you, Quinoa. I'm actually here promoting my new non-fiction book, "More Human Than I". Some have credited it as contributing greatly to the deconstruction of the binary social relation between human and entity in our society, but I try to be humbler about it. I think that it's simply common sense that the pedestal we put humans on as somehow special is completely arbitrary when you consider that we're more of an invasive species than any so-called entity in the Backrooms, and I'm just glad people are waking up to that method of thinking. I mean, even the labels of "human" and "entity" exist solely on account of and for each other, and by resolving the dialectic between those two labels, we can see that humans are just as "entity" as any other life in the Backrooms.
Quinoa: You know, I've always considered myself to be the modern-day Barrack Obama. I don't know who that is, but people compare me to him a lot.
Newkirk: Is that a question?
Quinoa: Yes.
Newkirk: Oh.
Quinoa: Well, that's about all we have time for today. Remember to follow your heart, everybody!
M.E.G. Announcement: Super Almond Water
A recent and unexplained shift has changed Almond Water from a nutritious drink that maintains physical health to a powerful panacea capable of potentially healing any wound or illness, physical or otherwise, and exterminating any hostile entities it comes into contact with. This new form has been dubbed "Super Almond Water". Analysis by M.E.G. personnel suggests that the effect is currently muted but will go into full effect over the next few weeks. Wanderers who are suffering from anything of any kind are encouraged to begin taking Almond Water daily over the next couple weeks and report its effects to your local M.E.G. Base. This discovery could change everything for us, so it is incredibly important that you spread the news of Super Almond Water to as many people as you can. We are witnessing how powerful a glimmer of hope can be.
M.E.G. - Bettering Humanity
PART III: ID
Audio Recording of ENTITY Meeting in Level 18
Unknown: "Level 18: safe, secure, minimal entity count." Did you know that until very recently, it was impossible to label a level as "safe" unless it had "minimal entities"? Does that make sense to you?
[Members of the crowd yell out "No!"]
Unknown: The idea of plastering the number of entities on a safety rating makes me sick. The human-supremacist view is baked into the very structure of the Database and everyone who contributes to it. The M.E.G., our supposed heroes label themselves the "saviors of humanity". But what about those who don't fall under their rigid definitions of a normal "human"? I think we all know how much saving would happen, then.
Unknown: I brought you here to this level today to show you something. In front of you is a piece of ground labeled with the grave of a peaceful being who once lived in M.E.G. Base Alpha. His name was "Mo", and he was a wonderful soul who brought joy to all those he interacted with. A few weeks ago, he passed away under what the M.E.G. labeled as natural causes. His funeral was held on this level believed to be his place of origin. I have dug up the shallow grave where his coffin rested for a reason you will soon understand.
[The unknown speaker can be heard moving around something heavy and wooden.]
Unknown: Empty. Do you know why this coffin is empty? We found Mo's body in a storage room at Base Alpha. It was never buried in the coffin.
[The unknown speaker can be heard tearing back a sheet. The crowd gasps in shock.]
Unknown: Does this look like natural causes to you? Does this look like an accident? Leaked M.E.G. correspondence revealed that this being was used as a tool to access another level. Today the M.E.G. released an announcement claiming they've discovered a way to use Almond Water to "exterminate hostile entities". So, let me ask you, which is a more hostile entity, the poor being whose body I now hold in my hands or the monsters who slaughtered him?
[The crowd begins yelling.]
<End Log>
Deep inside the Goop, concepts and anti-concepts form and deform, and for a brief moment, a piece of chaos coalesces into the form of a lamb and a skeleton.
"Petya," the lamb begins, "Have you heard the Zen Buddhist koan about the cow?"
The skeleton does not reply. It's already dead. It's been dead a long time.
"I was raised Gnostic, so forgive me if this isn't perfectly accurate, but I'm told the koan is a phrase that first seems to be absurd, but by focusing your meditation on the phrase, not on understanding it but becoming it, you can find some insight there."
"The phrase is thus: 'On big island live only one cow'. Seems queer, no? I mean, it's not even grammatically correct. But grammar is not meaning. If I presented you with a map that has each country mixed up and shuffled, you would not throw the map away for lack of accuracy. You would wonder what world I had seen to possess me into presenting that map as the truth."
"It is specifically by freeing itself from the control of the system of grammar that the koan of the cow finds its beauty, for the confusion caused by such syntactical play frees up the unconscious mind while the conscious is busy decoding the symbols in front of it."
"So let's play at decoding. It is not 'a big island'; it is not 'the big island'; the article is left off because it is something deeper than that: the fundamentally archetypal concept of 'big island' that has been passed through the collective unconscious of humanity in myths, stories, and dreams. The choice of 'live' instead of 'lives', too, is important because it is one cow, but it is: one. The cow is not just cow, but all that ever is or was."
"And one day the you will understand that. You are the cow. You are the island. You are alive. And you are one."
Somewhere, far away, a cow takes in its first breath of air, though chronologically, it has been breathing for a very long time, and in between two eternities of silence, the skeleton speaks for the first and last time: "To-o-o-o bbbbbbe honest, 👁 n ever quighght liked the taste ov bananana laffy taffy."
"Aye," the lamb replies, "I can sympathize with that point of view."
The lamb continues: "In 1946, Jorge Luis Borges wrote of an apocryphal map of the territory of a lost empire. This map, he said, was built with such exactitude that it reached a 1:1 scale, but as the empire fell, the map was no longer maintained, and the decaying corpse of the facsimile was all but abandoned, derelict except for the occasional beast or beggar that found shelter in its rotting paper walls."
"I think this is the fate of all simulacra: all meaning slowly being squeezed out by the incestuous process of copying copies of copies until what little worth once was is spread far too thin to mean anything. It's strange to consider the lineage of Disneyland. It's a representation of reproductions of reproductions of fables and fairy tales that were once meant to represent real life many generations ago. But that life it represented has come and gone, the meaning dissolved into a hollow nostalgia trap, designed perfectly in a lab so that every coming generation feels the same nostalgia for the empty culture that was shoved down their throat by their parents who, in turn, ate the same corporate slop."
"I will never be able to taste the pure Gros Michel banana that isoamyl acetate shallowly tries to recreate because we killed it long ago. In our greed for unified chemical perfection, we slowly bred out the diversity of the fruits mother nature had made for us until they were all wiped out by a single disease. There truly is something sick about the way these empty simulacra are the closest we have to an original we can never get back. So I hold no judgment to those who cannot stomach the taste."
Dear M.E.G. Overseers,
Madeline
I have attached with this letter the last photograph I ever took of my sister, Madeline. Although her face looks unassuming, there's courage behind her eyes. One week ago, under M.E.G. orders, my sickly sister was forced to drink the new and improved "super" almond water as a cure for her ailments. She cried and cried and told me she couldn't stomach it. That she could only barely taste the faint hint of cashews over the metallic taste of her own blood. When I was at her bedside last night, she told me there was a burning in her skull. That was the last thing she ever said.
I haven't had any almond water since last week, but I can still feel my neural circuits rusting as my brain shuts down, but even a dying fool like me can see what you've done. You said, in your first report, that almond water could "exterminate" hostile entities. I've lived a very sheltered life in Eleven, and before today I didn't think I'd ever come into contact with a hostile entity, but now I understand. Everyone around me is dying, M.E.G.—their blood is on your hands—and it just makes me wonder whether this poison will finally exterminate you.
Sincerely,
A Dying Man
THE END?
Somewhere far away, white sap weeps from the cut in the birch. The sap forms words in the dry soil. These words will fade away after a while, though they will stay longer than the birch ever expected. If anyone ever cares to read them, this is what they say:
It's important to remember that the Backrooms were once a single paragraph about a series of empty rooms. Then, someone decided that not all of the rooms should be yellow, and still another decided to characterize the monsters that were implied to reside within those dirty walls. It was not long until the Backrooms became more than just a story, but folklore and fable within our collective imagination, too wild and unwieldy for one person, one community, one wiki to hold. It is arrogance to think you can control a world like that. All we can do is build, write stories, and create catalysts for future narratives in a world that breathes and moves like any other living thing.
All we can do is find beauty in the impossibility of control.
All we can do is create.
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